Friday, 23 September 2016

Literacy Homework due Friday, 30th September

Literacy Homework due Friday, 30th September

Have a look at this boring list poem.

In the blue dream jar you might find:

a parrot,
a butterfly,
the sea,
the sky,
a precious stone,
a gift.




How can you improve it? Maybe you could add some exciting adjectives (gargantuan, ferocious) or some powerful verbs (pounced, erupted). You could include some alliteration (the menacing monster was munching his meaty meal) or a simile (its skin was a cold as ice, it crawled like a snail).

Write your own, improved version of the poem. I can't wait to see what you come up with!

40 comments:

  1. ARMAAN
    In the gold dream jar you can find :
    A gold lambogini speeding down the road
    A solid gold brick falling from the sky
    A surperb ferrari sppedind down the M1
    A gold GTR running at top speed

    ReplyDelete
  2. In the blue dream jar you might find:
    a talkative parrot in a golden cage,
    a colourful butterfly flapping his wings,
    a stormy sea with saling ships,
    the sky as dark as ink,
    a precious stone that rolls like a ball,
    a gorgeous gift that everyone dreams of.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Avish
    The precious stone
    In the blue dream jar you might find:
    a precious stone locked away in a ship, in the middle of the sea.
    Hard, rough, heavy, tough and dramatically shiny in the colour of cherry red, in a shape of a octagon.
    It is locked away because its £3 million and is magical.
    The magic is only released at midnight when the sky is pitch black.
    The magic gives butterflies and parrots strength to guide the ship.




    ReplyDelete
  4. In the gold dream jar you can find
    A money swimming pool
    A wonderful big villa
    A speedy man that runs a extra 2 mile
    A sky that makes gold stuff come fulling down
    A fast Porsche the is a 1444 mile car

    ReplyDelete
  5. In the blue jearm jar you might find a clourfull parrot making a nest a amasing buterfly a wavay sea a preasious stone in your hand a boring gift

    ReplyDelete
  6. In the blue dream jar you might find:

    a beautiful colourful parrot, gliding gracefully,
    a peaceful, delicate, fluttering butterfly, hovering through the jungle,
    the gigantic, everlasting sea, deep and dangerous,
    the cool sky, with clouds like candy floss,
    a precious shimmering stone, shining like glittering stars,
    a mysterious gift tied with a red ribbon.

    ReplyDelete
  7. Kian

    In the blue dream jar you might find:

    A pecking purple blue parrot eating his seeds,
    A beautiful blue butterfly as warm as fire,
    The powerful waves of the glittering see,
    The shiny sparkly blue sky as sparkly as a star,
    A golden,smooth and sparkly blue precious stone,
    A half of a blue apple as a gift.



    y

    ReplyDelete
  8. From Shaina

    A parrot peacefully gliding through the puffy clouds,
    Along came a beautiful butterfly, fluttering past the pecking parrot.
    She was bright and colourful, but very loud,
    She thought his beak looked like an unusual carrot.
    The sun shining in the sunset sky,
    Reflecting off the sparkling and glistening sea.
    The proud parrot glimpsed at a precious stone from above high,
    He swooped the stone lying on the sandy beach,
    Which he presented as a gift to brave butterfly,
    Thinking it was a delicious peach.

    ReplyDelete
  9. Forgot to add:

    This is what I find in my blue dream jar.

    ReplyDelete
  10. In the blue dream jar you can find:

    A glorious parrot as colourful as a rainbow pecking a tree
    A wonderful butterfly fluttering around your head
    A bright sea crashing on the rocky beach
    A beautiful, shining stone in the sunshine
    A sweet teddy bear given as a glamorous gift.

    ReplyDelete
  11. In the blue dream jar you can find:
    A colourful, annoying parrot blabbering
    A symmetrical, stunning butterfly fluttering it's way
    A stormy sea swishing as rapid as a cheetah
    A darkened sky showering on poor people along the rocky road
    A rare, rakish ruby glinting(reflecting)in the yellow, sunny sun
    A glorious gift rolling of a grey cliff

    Sanchita

    ReplyDelete
  12. IN THE BLUE DREAM JAR YOU MIGHT FIND A CLOUFULL PAROTT MAKING A NEST A BUTIFULL BUTERFLY feeding her catapilaer the humangous everlasting sea crashing with waves a cloudy sky bright as the sun a preasious stone shineing like a star a kind gifit tied whith aribion

    ReplyDelete
  13. In the blue dream jar you might find:
    a pretty, precious parrot as colourful as a rainbow swooping through the sky,
    a glamorous butterfly fling high to the stupendous sky,
    the sea sparkling like a sapphire never still as restless as a hunting heart,
    the furious burning sky throwing a meteor,
    a precious glimmering stone being took out,
    a fun, amazing and cool gift being opened.

    ReplyDelete
  14. In the blue dream jar you might find
    A parrot coppy every word on the Golden tree.
    A butterfly, flying from flower to flower.
    The sea full of golfish and seashells.
    The beautiful sky full of Sun.
    A precious stone magicaly gold.
    And at the end of the great gift the sweetest candy what I ever ate.PatrickD

    ReplyDelete
  15. Avish
    In the blue dream jar you might find:

    a blue and red talking parrot making it's nest,
    a white butterfly flapping around a red flower,
    the sea's waves as big as a house,
    the sky is as blue as the sea,
    a precious magical stone as gray as a cloud,
    a very special gift.

    ReplyDelete
  16. In the blue dream jar you might find
    A colourful parott flying and having a brilliant time,
    A beautiful butterfly fluttering in her lovely land,
    A huge tide makeing the humongous waves as big as a mountain,
    The sky as blue as turquoise,
    A preasious stone as preasious as a diamond
    A very special gift was a iPhone 7 plus edge.





    ReplyDelete
  17. This comment has been removed by the author.

    ReplyDelete
  18. In the magical blue dream jar you might find:

    A colourful parrot flying up so high,
    A beautiful butterfly fluttering by,
    The blue sea washing against the sand,
    The bright and clear sky makes you so smile,
    A small golden precious stones are
    laying on the glittering sand as a special gift for
    you and me.

    Damir

    ReplyDelete
  19. In the blue dream jar you can find:
    A beautiful red and green parrot,
    An orange,black and quiet butterfly flying from flower to flower.
    A stormy sea being swirled around at the rainy night.
    The sky as blue as the sea not even a cloud in the sky.
    A bright green precious stone what gives me good luck.
    A gift what gives me sunny and great days.

    ReplyDelete
  20. Patrick
    In the blue dream jak you might find
    A parrot coppy every word on the Golden tree.
    A butterfly, flying from flower to flower.
    The sea full of golfish and seashells.
    The beautiful sky full of Sun.
    A precious stone magicaly gold.
    And at the end of the great gift the sweetest candy what I ever ate.

    ReplyDelete
  21. IN THE BLUE DREAM JAR YOU CAN FIND:
    A puffy parrot pecking on wood,
    A beautiful butterfly fluttering by,
    A silent sea moving gently,
    A pale blue sky up in the air,
    A precious stone shimmering,
    A glorious gift.
    BY NEHA
    IN THE BLUE DREAM JAR YOU CAN FIND:
    A puffy parrot pecking on wood,
    A beautiful butterfly fluttering by,
    A silent sea moving gently,
    A pale blue sky up in the air,
    A precious stone shimmering,
    A glorious gift.
    BY NEHA
    IN THE BLUE DREAM JAR YOU CAN FIND:
    A puffy parrot pecking on wood,
    A beautiful butterfly fluttering by,
    A silent sea moving gently,
    A pale blue sky up in the air,
    A precious stone shimmering,
    A glorious gift.
    BY NEHA
    IN THE BLUE DREAM JAR YOU CAN FIND:
    A puffy parrot pecking on wood,
    A beautiful butterfly fluttering by,
    A silent sea moving gently,
    A pale blue sky up in the air,
    A precious stone shimmering,
    A glorious gift.

    ReplyDelete
  22. Soleiman
    In the blue dream jar you might find:


    A blue beautiful parrot singing to its baby
    A light blue butterfly fluttering about near its home
    A dark blue wave as big as a killer wale
    The never ending sky as wide as a mountain
    A special stone that's more special than a diamond
    A very special gift as special as a iPhone


    By soleiman




    ReplyDelete
  23. In the blue dream jar you can find:

    A beautiful rainbow parrot trying to escape
    A brave butterfly was looking bored
    The sea was dancing alone
    The blue sky is filled with singing birds
    A pink precious stone glowing
    A mystery gift is waiting to be opened

    ReplyDelete
  24. In the blue dream jar you might find ;
    A parrot so bright it hurt my eyes.
    A beautiful butterfly that made me sigh.
    A calm sea where lies mystery beneath.
    A grey sky which scares you with thundering rain and lightning.
    A precious stone so rare and valuable.
    A gift so good, never to be forgotten.


    ReplyDelete
  25. Anonymous Subhan

    In the blue dream jar you can find:
    A colorful rainbow parrot flying around.
    A beautiful butterfly fluttering flower to flower.
    The sea full of different kind of colorful fishes.
    The sky is blue, full of fluffy white clouds.
    A blue shiny precious stone magical as a fairy.
    And the final one a gift which surprises me all the time.


    ReplyDelete
  26. In the blue dream jar you might find: a cute parrot chirping on trees a beautiful butterfly reminds of a colourful rainbow the children of sea waves racing to be on top of the cliff the stormy cloud showering the rain in the dark sky a precious stone lying on the shimmering beach a pearl as gift wrapped in a sea shell.

    ReplyDelete
  27. In the blue dream jar you can find:
    The sea is waving with cool breeze of waves making mysterious song,
    Talkative parrot is chirping on branches along
    A colourful butterfly captures me,enthrals me as I gaze with heartfelt,
    The winter sky's like velvet deepest-blue, sprinkled, lavishly with stars like precious stone...
    I feel so blessed, a part of all this glorious gift!

    ReplyDelete
  28. In the blue dream jar you can find:
    A green, garrulous parrot gawking gleefully
    At a frisky, fragile, butterfly fluttering far away from its friends
    Into the boundless, blue sky beckoning beautiful beginnings
    And over the silent serene sea, stirring sinister storms
    To find the exquisite, elegant emerald engraved in the eternity
    Oh! What a glorious gift to be grateful for!

    ReplyDelete
  29. Abshir,

    In the blue dream jar you might find:
    A pretty colourful parrot making a huge nest.
    A beautiful butterfly flying towards the sea.
    The sky clear and blue.
    A sparkling precious stone as a diamond.
    A wonderful gift of nature.

    ReplyDelete
  30. Abshir,

    In the blue dream jar you might find:
    A pretty colourful parrot making huge nest.
    A beautiful butterfly flying towards the sea.
    The sky clear and blue.
    Asparkling precious stone as a diamond.
    A wonderful gift.

    ReplyDelete
  31. Abshir.

    In the blue dream jar you might find:
    A pretty colourful parrot making huge nest.
    A beautiful butterfly towards the sea.
    The sky clear and blue.
    A precious stone sparkling.
    finly wonderful gift.

    ReplyDelete
  32. In the blue dream jar you can find:
    A rainbow coloured parrot flying above the lightened sky.
    A beautiful butterfly landed on a lotus.
    The enormous sea peacefully came back and fort.
    The bright blue sky lasting forever and no gust of wind.
    A giant precious stone and it looked as the same as a diamond.
    A precious gift to alea.

    by Biyon

    ReplyDelete
  33. Nidhi

    In the dream jar you might find:
    The sea is waving with the Cool breeze of waves making mysterious song.
    Talkative parrot is chirping on the branches along.
    Colourful butterfly captures me, enthrals me, as I gaze with heartfelt.
    The winter sky's like velvet deepest blue.
    Sprinkled, lavishly, with stars like precious stone.
    I feel so blessed, a part of all this glorious gift!

    ReplyDelete
  34. Nidhi

    In the blue dream jar you might find:
    The sea waving with the cool breeze of waves making mysterious song...
    Talkative parrot is chirping on the branches along,
    Colourful butterfly captures me enthralls me, as I gaze with heartfelt.
    The winter sky's like velvet deepest blue, sprinkled lavishly with stars like precious stone....
    I feel so blessed, a part of all this glorious gift!

    ReplyDelete
  35. In the blue dream jar you might find:
    A parrot flying in the wind,
    A butterfly fluttering in the breeze,
    The sea facing the shiny sun,
    The sky covered with white clouds,
    A precious stone that absorbs an electric storm and a gift as thoughtful as the moon.

    ReplyDelete
  36. Jayden

    In the blue dream jar you will find:

    A hungry parrot pecking on poppy seeds,
    A beautiful blue butterfly resting on a bush,
    The sun shimmering on a still sea,
    Shooting stars in a stormy sky,
    A precious stone sinking into the silky sand,
    A gift of a golden goblet filled to the brim with glorious gulab jamun.

    ReplyDelete
  37. Somaya. In the blue dream jar you can find a....
    colourful parrot flying in the tall tree.
    A beautiful butterfly fluttering around a clean garden .
    A crystal clear ocean.
    A bright still sky.
    A delicate stone.
    A rattling gift.

    ReplyDelete
  38. In the blue jar where dreams come true, you might find:
    A tropical, bright coloured parrot,
    A stunning coloured butterfly which is flying calmly,
    The calm aqua sea with the suns reflection flickering on the surface,
    The sunny clear blue summer sky,
    A precious, ruby red smooth stone
    And a mysterious unknown gift, waiting for it to be unwrapped...

    ReplyDelete
  39. Sheza
    In the blue dream jar you can find
    A gawky green garrulous parrot
    An astonishing scarlet butterflies fluttering in the wind
    A twighlight,crimson and boundless sky
    A calm and wavy sea gently pushing it's way to the shore
    A shimmering and rare special stone
    A royal and glorious gift

    ReplyDelete